Thursday, February 19, 2015

February 2015 Blush Mystery Beauty Box

Here's a quick rundown of the last year with the Blush Mystery Beauty Box, formerly the best mystery beauty box:

In 2014, the Blush Mystery Beauty Box started sucking in mysterious and confusing ways:

  • They sent out more shampoo than you can shake a stick at.
  • They sent repeat items frequently, sometimes only a month or two after the first time.
  • They sent expired products and it seemed like they were clearing out extra inventory rather than thoughtfully putting together a collection of products.
I kept hoping it would get better, but it only got worse, so finally in November I canceled my subscription.

Then! The December box came out and it looked great, so I resubscribed. I was very happy.

Then! The featured item for January was an item that we'd received in December, and another item was one we'd received a couple months before that. The internet was SO MAD. I think Blush included that product in December's box by mistake and only meant for it to be in January's but maybe the Blush Mystery Beauty Box is put together by robots who don't notice things like that. But whatever. Blush sent out a shitty coupon apologizing for the duplicate items. I decided to hold on another month but if they sent more duplicates or shampoo I'd unsubscribe again.

This month is February. Here's my review for this month, along with a subjective and illogical rating system.

February 2015 Blush Mystery Beauty Box

Alterna Bamboo Smooth Kendi Pure Treatment Oil - This is stuff for your hair. I've used it a couple times. It smells nice and my hair seems to like it. +10 points

 
100 Percent Pure Creamy Nail Polish in Kiss - I don't like the color (reddish pink) but we haven't gotten fingernail polish in a long time and getting fingernail polish from the Blush Mystery Beauty Box changed my life. I'll give this away because I don't wear pinkish red fingernail polish but I approve of this. +5 points

 
Cargo Liquid Liner in Black - Blush sends Cargo products frequently but they haven't sent much eyeliner lately. I probably won't wear this but if I wore eyeliner I would. +5 points

 
Neostrata Skin Active Antioxidant Defense Serum - We get a lot of these "antioxidant" "defense" "serums" and I don't know if there's any difference between any of them but I'll use this and don't mind it. It's a small sample so if I don't like it I won't have to deal with it for long. +5 points

 
TOCCA Hand Cream in Stella - This is the featured item this month and you got one of three flavors. I got blood orange. Yum! Delicious! This is nice stuff! +10 points

 
TOCCA Eau de Parfum in Stella - Small sample of perfume. Normally I'm not into perfume, but this is the same flavor as the hand cream, and it seems like they matched the flavors for everyone. And that's nice! That brings the points for this up from 5 points to +15 points

 
Juliette Has a Gun Perfume - Oh, another small sample of perfume. I'm impressed by the thoughtfulness of the TOCCA perfume/hand cream, but this... it's French, but mostly I'm confused about the name. She has a gun? Good for her. Does she smell good? Does her gun smell good? What does a gun have to do with this? -10 points


Vichy Idealia Life Serum - Oh, another "serum". That's a -10, but it's French, so +0 points

 
Sarah Potempa The Wrap Up - A thing to put your hair into fancy buns that look like bagels. This won't work for people who don't have bun hair, but it's a unique item. I'm a little freaked out by perfect buns but luckily for me (or unluckily) my hair still looks like a pile of straw and not a bagel. +10 points

Total points out of a possible one million: +50 points
No, wait, I really like that hand cream, it's worth another 10 points. So, all together, +60 points!

I won't unsubscribe after this month but Blush is still on shaky grounds. I'm not trying to be a jerk but it really hasn't been happy times lately for subscribers of the Blush Mystery Beauty Box. BMBB4eva? I don't know.

Will Blush send shampoo next month? Will they send another tube of TOCCA Hand Cream? If they did would I be upset about the duplicate or would I be happy to get another tube of super great hand cream? Tune in next month to find out!